THE BELOVED
DARK WOODS FAMILY
Our cast is what makes us special; special in so many ways. Cast members work tirelessly to provide the best Halloween experience to each and every guest. Each year, The Dark Woods is fortunate enough to have a solid collection of dedicated, enthusiastic, creative, and all-around-GOOD people who help with the production. We honor our cast members each and every year at The Ghlouie Awards.
Interested in Joining our Cast? Click the links below for more info and Job Application.
COUSIN SAMUEL
A lonesome loser, but an aspiring rockstar and expert cuddler.
Porkrind Patterson
Master of puppeteering and superb saddle sniffer.
Punkin' Head
Excellent diversified portfolio of moderately-aggressive stocks.
Wellmax Von Rupenstein III
Plays mediocrely-well with others. Does bite.
Arden
Expert welder and part time limo driver.
Mistress Dread
She's detention happy.
Roadrash
He'll fix your vehicle, but there will be extra parts leftover.
Don Francis
Fired for being too darn handsome.
Fungus
Hang out in the woods long enough, and the shrooms just start sprouting.
Old Man Jenkins
He needs a nap and a changing.
Gramps
Grateful Costco member since 2018.
Willard
Not hugged as child and often smells like salted meats.
Baby
Gorgeous and personable and warm legged.
Swamp Witch
She's willing to provide a reading or unveil your fortune...or misfortune.
Nurse Pick-It
Gets light headed at the sight of her own blood {anyone else's blood is fine}.
Sister Prey
Let the confessions begin: you go first.
Lurch
There are {broken} chains around his neck for a reason.
Batty Betty
Sit down, shut your mouth hole, and stay behind the line!
Jebediah
Best to just stand real still and let him sniff your ear. He spooks easily.
Abigail
Willing to share her lunch meat...but you gots to ask nice.
Jenni Lyn
Willing to part with her puppy for $50.00. It has worms.
Mort & Son
A long family lineage of entrepreneurs in a booming industry.
The Artist
The portrait zey paint will be unlike any other you've seen.
Willy
Terrific role model for yougsters.
Paul
A former kindergarten teacher now turned canned meat enthusiast.
Husky
Chicks dig a guy who wears an 1:8 mix ratio of oil and gasoline as cologne.
Fern
Take a sip of the potion and see what happens {actually, better not do that}.
Josie Jo
Skipped 3rd grade after her teacher went mysteriously missing.
Paul
Privacy is optional.
Beasty
Isn't she adorable? Don't stare.
Grace
Running for office in 2028.
Lolli
Sugar and sweets rot more than just your teeth.
